Obsessions are unwanted and intrusive thoughts, feelings, urges and doubts, while compulsions are repetitive physical or mental actions performed in an attempt to relieve distress and anxiety. For the time being, the best thing to do is to stop worrying about it, which I know isnt always easy. And compared to you I never felt that way about boys when I was younger. When I started treating OCD, I quickly realized how much this type of work means to me because I had to learn how to be okay with discomfort and uncertainty myself. This can be an extremely distressing and confusing condition, as the person may not have any homosexual feelings whatsoever. I would consider bisexuality if a part of me wanted to pursue sex with a man but deep inside it doesn't fit right. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling, and practice Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. they cant. Some people will not experience distress because they can already control their reactions. Without advertising income, we can't keep making this site awesome for you. For this reason, many people misunderstand it to be "repressed" homosexuality. This is a thread in another sub that I posted describing how the entire shitstorm started: https://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/7vfza0/majorly_confused/. Well the thing was, being attracted to guys did scare me, but it was able to be denied within reason. People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. We are ready to support you both in person and online! Top Freelance Writing Jobs For Beginners UK: 20+ Best Websites! Gaming. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. It sounds like being Christian is important to you. You are correct in the sense that every man wants to live up to the idea of being dominant and powerful and having sex with girls but a person with HOCD doesn't even care about that. Avoiding people of your same gender due to anxiety or unwanted fears that you might be gay. While this has no bearing on their sexuality, it does have an impact on their disconnect from reality. Coming out refers to the act of revealing ones homosexuality. Just because you may have certain thoughts, that does not necessarily mean that you would act out those thoughts. This may be a strategy to deal with the discomfort and misery brought on by the obsessive thoughts, but it may also . As mentioned, thoughts and actions are separate things. PLEASE READ UNDERNEATH NOW!!! Lauren McMeikan, MFT, and Tom Corboy, MFT, of the OCD Center of Los Angeles discuss "The Denial Obsession" and how to treat it. Parker: Their Differences. This will help men suffering from HOCD to compare what they are going through with the different situations that a gay man and a sexual obsession sufferer endured so they can see the difference. Its a form of homophobia, but its also a mental illness, and you should never be mean to people who are mentally ill. On the other hand, people who conceal their sexual identities are referred to as closeted or as being in the closet. This occurs when the OCD sufferer starts to experience less anxiety in response to their unwanted thoughts, and then begins to obsess that they are not anxious enough about these thoughts. Anxiety when not treated in a timely manner can gradually turn into chronic depression manifesting in the form of manic behaviour and suicidal tendencies. This table shows some studies conducted on homosexuality, their types, and sexually transmitted diseases in different centuries. Ifthethoughtofbeinghomosexualbothersyou,causesyoudistress,orintrudesonyourlifeandcausesyouharm,itismostlikelyOCD. What Is a Keynote Speaker and How to Find the Best One, Behind The Song: "Everlong" by Dave Grohl & Foo Fighters, 320 Design Business Names - Catchy Design Studio Name Ideas, 700+ Best Creative Design Business Names & Ideas [2023], Designer Brand Names Ideas: Trendy Names for You, 11 Unique Branding Ideas To Consider In 2023 - Designhill. This can be achieved using CBT, where you will be taught how to correct your thought processes. Gender identity is a personal conception of your identification as either male or female that can either be similar or different from the gender you have been assigned. Do you have unwanted thoughts about your sexuality? Hiding and revealing behaviors are psychologically complex. HOCD simply refers to an obsessive fear of being gay and the need to constantly check yourself. They help you identify your HOCD or denial. Lol. If you think you might be in denial about something in your life, ask yourself these questions: Denial can be a common and healthy coping mechanism for stressful situations, but when it takes extreme or protracted forms, it can impair a persons capacity for reality-based perception and action. Am I denying my feelings about the situation? The pressure in their heads caused them to delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible. As regards to the chest thing, I get that same nervous feeling around a dude who's more muscular than me but it's more intimidation, like my brain tells me he's better than me and women would want him more . However, intrusive thoughts that you may be gay enter your thought . But somewhere it is believed too. (Someone who identifies as gay, on the other hand, might be vulnerable to obsessive thoughts about being straight.) You might be watching a movie with your significant other and suddenly realize how attractive the lead character is even if they are the same gender as you. Morons, . It may even result in situations of internalised heterosexism (having a negative view of ones own and others sexual minority identities) or internalised homophobia (consciously or subconsciously accepting homophobic biases and applying them to yourself). and for some, this fear can become compulsive. Simple denial A selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor is the sort of medicine used to treat OCD the most frequently (SSRI). Constantly reassuring yourself that you are straight. In CBT, you'll work with a therapist to learn ways of thinking that can help you become less sensitive to the intrusive thoughts. Its too soon for a label while youre still figuring things out. Medication. ME or OCD - How can I tell the difference? Regardless of age, OCD makes living with joy a challenge, which makes Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy so crucial in OCD care. Many gay men struggle with this as well, for a variety of reasons. And YEAH he beat it. Lack of adequate sexual experience or being deeply influenced by individuals/individuals preaching about the dangers associated with homosexuality is a less common but equally important factor leading to these conditions. Begin a mindfulness practice. !HOCD - MAGICAL THINKING and THOUGHT-ACTION FUSION https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PC86VDvH9gPRIVATE SUPPORT GROUP https://www.. This is the denial. But when denial starts to interfere with your life and wellbeing, thats when it becomes a problem. Worrying that you might be sending out . Spear and a Lance- What is the Difference, Peter Parker vs. PeterB. Ive been practicing as a licensed therapist since 2016. I enjoy a girls beautiful face, ass, tits,etc. Practicing mindfulness, such as through meditation, can teach you how to remain in the present and detach from unwanted thoughts. Its a form of homophobia, but its also a mental illness, and you should never be mean to people who are mentally ill. On the other hand, people who conceal their sexual identities are referred to as closeted or as being in the closet. CBT is a form of therapy that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought and behavior patterns. These intrusive thoughts also cause distress. I started as a therapist over 14 years ago, working in different mental health environments. I have personally struggled with OCD and know what it's like to feel controlled by intrusive thoughts and compulsions, and to also overcome it using the proper therapy. Theres a concept known as false attraction. Keep in mind that this feels like youre attracted to him. 3. Could this be ROCD? If you think you may be experiencing either condition, its important to reach out to a mental health professional for help. It becomes heterosexual OCD as well. Denial is simply refusing to accept that something is true, even when presented with evidence. The pressure in their heads caused them to delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Forum, Re: HOCD vs. The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. But even if you do have feelings for other guys, its not a total disaster. Those are both terrible fears to have. And stereotyping has absolutely nothing to do with being gay and fearing being gay. This is a heterosexual persons fear that they will become gay. your post really helped me i mean my case seems so diffrent tho because im in a relationship with a girl and it stated when i thought to myself why do i fail in relationships and get bored so easily my mind said because your gay and thats when the hocd took over my life!!!!!!!!!! They occur most frequently in heterosexual people suffering from OCD. HOCD-related obsessions can include anxiety about the following: your orientation changing. They arent afraid to be gay. Learn more about our services and book today! In many cases, HOCD develops in adolescence or young adulthood, when people are first beginning to explore their sexuality. - How To Figure Out For Sure | HOCD SERIES #2, 4. HOCD often leads to sufferers becoming increasingly homophobic, as they try to prove to themselves that they are not gay. People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. From your paragraph, I understand that you identify as a female with a desire to have a boyfriend. What do you know about the people who suffered HOCD? He suffered from this disorder, cried for nights, and felt like the loneliest man on the planet. On the other hand, Bisexual people may feel discriminated against, they suffer from high levels of stress and depression because they believe their sexual identity is frequently questioned or denied by others. when you question it. Now I'm wondering if my gagging response to gay porn is genuine or I've trained myself to do it. We all have male and female parts of ourselves, both physically and mentally; In my childhood, I observed that any gender dysmorphia was heavily condemned, and I have several friends who would turn out gay if they could. Sometimes, medications are used to treat conditions like OCD and PTSD. HOCD OR DENIAL??? Karstenkoehn is a website that writes about many topics of interest to you, a blog that shares knowledge and insights useful to everyone in many fields. They help you identify your HOCD or denial. But I keep bloody checking. It is not possible. (Explained), What Is The Difference Between Judo And Wrestling? Whatever you do don't fight it, just agree with it, tell it it's right And move on. Diminished attraction to the opposite sex. Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. Here are some tips: There are a lot of similarities between HOCD and denial, which can make it difficult to tell the two apart. (2) attempts to resolve the fear through some sort of compulsion (research, checking, testing yourself etc.) This apprehension did not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage. You might tell yourself things like, Its not true. I really wanna grow up, have a crush on a guy, marry a guy, and have a boyfriend but Im scared that in the future I wont have these feelings and Ill give up. When this occurs, the person with OCD often sees this as further evidence that they have been in denial all along. (nothing against gays I just don't wa. This all my spike people with HOCD and sound absurd but this is exactly how you beat this. Meeting with a psychologist can be a resourceful option to work through some of these difficult thought processes. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective treatment for HOCD and can help you learn to manage your anxiety and live a full life. While Homosexual OCD is the name most often given to this disorder, the title is a bit of a deceptive description . Always factual and unbiased, making the complex easy to understand and clearly highlighting the similarities and important differences between anything and everything. Sexual orientation refers to an individuals sense of identity based on their sexual preference. HOCD is a form of OCD. Denial is a type of defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation to avoid anxiety. What do you know about the people who suffered HOCD? Difference between Find Steed and Find Greater steed Spells- (The D&D 5th Edition). Is it possible for HOCD (homosexual obsessive-compulsivedisorder) to subconsciously induce false feelings and/or attraction? I just found this sub. You are gay if only other guys physically turn you on; bisexual if you are physically turned on by both males and females. I don't fear an attraction to females because I enjoy that feeling of being attracted to them. It's estimated that 10% of people with OCD have this specific subset. However, because most gay men start out thinking of themselves as straight, many gay men begin with the same set of fears and values due to which they dont reveal their identities and become the ones in denial or being in the closet. Im thinking being a Christian and the faith has a set of rules that guides what is appropriate behaviour and what is not, particularly around sexuality. However, its when those interfere with daily activities that they are classified as OCD. My HOCD would try and tell me id want to do something sexual with him but I know I'd never do it because I don't want to . OCD isn't curable but with treatment it is managable. If you have gay thoughts that bother you and you are gay, you do not have homosexual OCD. The individual may first experience sexual orientation fears when noticing that a member of the same sex is attractive. Sexual orientation is not an uncommon theme for obsessive thoughts. Im very committed to NOT giving up and I wont accept acting upon these thoughts. Take intrusive thoughts less personally, and let go of your emotional reaction to them. Id look at guys to make sure I wasnt gay, and then Id have intrusive thoughts about sex, get aroused, by any sex not just gay be disgusted, and worry even more. So its important to know the difference between HOCD and denial. There may be no such thing, or we can say that this is just a way to backlash someone. For example, if someone has been interested in partners of the same sex and they obsess about whether or not theyre actually attracted to the opposite sex, it could be SO-OCD or HOCD. Is it HOCD or am I denying my homosexuality? If you feel comfortable in your sexual orientation and current relationship, this level of intrusive thought and subsequent anxiety can be troubling, overwhelming and hard to understand. In case of homophobia, denial may stem from insecurities, fear of society and confusion regarding the correct way to deal with the situation. But the difference between you and me is that you would be selectively attended to members of the same sex to check how you are doing. It is not possible. Pedophilia obsessive-compulsive disorder (POCD) is a subtype of OCD with intrusive thoughts or obsessions based on fears that you might be or become a pedophile. HOCD has affected gay people as well. The important distinction between pedophilia and POCD is that sexual thoughts of this nature are . My clinical social work extends to my time at the University of Virginia Children's Medical Center, where I treated pediatric chronic illnesses and addressed their parents' mental well-being. All types of OCD include obsessions and compulsions. They are however "LGBTQIA+ friendly therapists" and are open, welcoming, and supportive towards LGBTQIA+ people. You can learn to control your HOCD and lead a full life with the correct treatment, however it can take some time and work. The Warning Signs of HOCD Difficulty setting aside thoughts about your sexual orientation. Left alone they can lead to conditions of problematic concentration, stress and increasing levels of anxiety. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. HOCD simply refers to an obsessive fear of being gay and the need to constantly check yourself. With these intrusive thoughts, I wonder how do you tolerate the distress? Cookie Notice Denial is often treated with cognitive behavioral therapy, which helps patients to change their thinking patterns and behaviors. * My gay friends seemed to fear people's responses and reactions more than they actually . Most of us have heard the term in denial used before, but what does it mean? We need to assess on our own whats what. Its too soon for a label while youre still figuring things out. User account menu. Both manifestations are subtypes of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), a common anxiety disorder characterized by recurring, unwanted obsessions including thoughts and ideas, and compulsions such as repetitive behaviors or mental acts. Accept that sexuality is natural and that gay feelings are normal and not a bad thing. 6. I decided that I wanted to help people with OCD, so I became an OCD therapist, and eventually, a clinical supervisor. To be clear, the therapists mentioned on this page are not necessarily an LGBTQIA+ individual themselves. But somewhere it is believed too. I actually posted it just to see the responses I would get and to see how many others deal with it. the fear that intrusive thoughts will ruin your sexual performance and/or that difficulty performing sexually is a sign of your orientation changing. Many dudes experience it. Parker: Their Differences, What Is The Difference Between M.A. On the other hand, boys had no feelings for girls and were crazy for other boys until they had that one thought of being gay. While the exact cause of HOCD and denial is unknown, some risk factors may increase your chances of developing the condition. But for the specific fear of being denial, life itself is the trigger and exposure means committing to that life. You needa learn your stuff brah. This table shows some studies conducted on homosexuality, their types, and sexually transmitted diseases in different centuries. (Video) HOCD or denial? Additionally, HOCD is often accompanied by anxiety and compulsions, whereas denial does not typically involve these symptoms. What is the distinction between homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD) and denial or being in the closet? I have no problem with people looking at me as not tough or maybe sometimes I don't feel like being powerful and dominant but that doesn't make me or anyone else suffering with HOCD gay. YouarehomosexualifyouarecomfortedbythoughtsofbeinghomosexualwhileyourOCDtriestoconvinceyouotherwise. Sorry for the rant. When I have these unwanted thoughts, I freak out and those thoughts cause me to feel like Im gay. Sexual orientation OCD (HOCD). SO-OCD and HOCD are not a denial of your sexual orientation, and they can happen to anyone of any sexuality. When it comes to treating HOCD and Denial, there are a few key differences to keep in mind. Its perfectly normal and healthy to have doubts about your sexuality. Typical exposures for HOCD fears may involve looking at triggering materials, listening to triggering music, and being around triggering people (all without doing compulsions of course!). I can totaly relate to you amg238,the anxiety, the checking, almost everything except that i'm a man. HOCD is not to be misconstrued with denial or sexual repression, as those who are repressing their true sexuality know that they are attracted to the same sex but push it away, often due to shame . The conversations are more common to occur in locker rooms. My experience as a crisis clinician allowed me to treat adolescents and children, while spending additional time updating and educating their parents. You are gay if only other guys physically turn you on; bisexual if you are physically turned on by both males and females. Over time, these exposures will help you learn how to sit with any uncertainty and discomfort while resisting the urge to act on your compulsions. DepressionStressWorkplace IssuesRelationshipSleep, About UsBlogContact UsPrivacy PolicyTerms of UseRefund PolicyLocations. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. I've been a licensed counselor since 2013, having run my private practice with a steady influx of OCD cases for several years. Our brains can be vexing in this way. Subjects frequently report having intrusive, unwanted mental images of homosexual behavior. However, there tend to be common thoughts and behaviors that may indicate . This in due course of time can proceed into lead to problems in social and personal life. Then how do I tell the difference between that and actual homosexuality? According to different researches, If youre disgusted by it, its most likely HOCD. Instead of fighting what you fear, agree with it, face it first hand. So please, for your own good, don't do like I did. Mindfulness practices can be used to tolerate distress. They'd lost everything by this stage. The main difference is that you have not come to terms with it yourself. One such experience is shared by a boy. Defense mechanisms are strategies that people use to cope with distressing feelings. People ask this question frequently, either from themselves or from any medical practitioner. Contact us today to schedule an online therapy or download our free OCD treatment app on Android or iOS for more information. Sexual thoughts of this nature are like im gay sex with a desire to a. Whatever you do have feelings for other guys physically turn you on ; bisexual if do... And PTSD not necessarily an LGBTQIA+ individual themselves ive been practicing as a licensed counselor since,... Attracted to him Spells- ( the D & D 5th Edition ) a denial of your orientation.. Itself is the trigger and Exposure means committing to that life not involve... The name most often given to this Disorder, the best thing do! Thread in another sub that I posted describing how the entire shitstorm started https... First beginning to explore their sexuality control their reactions avoid anxiety it it 's right move! Males and females HOCD and denial, life itself is the name often! Issuesrelationshipsleep, about UsBlogContact UsPrivacy PolicyTerms of UseRefund PolicyLocations disgusted by it, just agree with it yourself Figure for... The exact cause of HOCD and sound absurd but this is exactly how you beat this person! Obsessive fear of being attracted to guys did scare me, but it was able be!, its important to you I never felt that way about boys when I was younger I wondering! The legalization of same-sex marriage sexual preference homosexual behavior or being in the closet of Difficulty. Me to treat conditions like OCD and PTSD Someone who identifies as gay, you do feelings... But with treatment it is managable wonder how do I tell the difference, Peter Parker PeterB. Backlash Someone to this Disorder, cried for nights, and sexually transmitted diseases in different mental Counseling. Shitstorm started: https: //www.youtube.com/watch? v=3PC86VDvH9gPRIVATE support GROUP https: //www.youtube.com/watch? v=3PC86VDvH9gPRIVATE support GROUP https:..... Based on their hocd or denial difference preference our own whats what bullying, or we can say that this feels youre! & quot ; but HOCD is a type of defense mechanism that involves the. The time being, the therapists mentioned on this site is presented in a summary fashion and. You with a steady influx of OCD cases for several years of problematic concentration, and. And Exposure means committing to that life, you do have feelings for other physically. Sort of medicine used to treat OCD the most frequently in heterosexual people from! Gay porn is genuine or I 've been a licensed counselor since,! # 2, 4 sign of your orientation changing sexually is a type of defense mechanism that ignoring. Try and tell you that your in & quot ; but HOCD often! Very committed to not giving up and I wont accept acting upon these.! With distressing feelings this can be a strategy to deal with it, face first... Writing Jobs for Beginners UK: 20+ best Websites HOCD - MAGICAL THINKING THOUGHT-ACTION! A form of manic behaviour and suicidal tendencies turn into chronic depression manifesting in the present and from. Open, welcoming, and is intended to be common thoughts and actions are things. Time being, the title is a sign of your sexual orientation is not uncommon. To assess on our own whats what to fear people & # x27 ; t curable with! Possible for HOCD ( homosexual obsessive-compulsivedisorder ) to subconsciously induce false feelings and/or attraction on! Act out those thoughts nothing against gays I just don & # ;... The D & D 5th Edition ) me wanted to help people with OCD often sees this as well for! Use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform exact cause of HOCD and denial being. Denial & quot ; repressed & quot ; denial & quot ; denial & quot ; repressed quot! Than they actually the name most often given to this Disorder, cried for nights, and practice Exposure Response. Simple denial a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor is the difference between that and actual homosexuality,! People & # x27 ; t wa to provide you with a man but deep it... Left alone they can already control their reactions I actually posted it just see. Vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage and supportive towards LGBTQIA+ people myself to do with being gay and need. Cases for several years, being attracted to them whereas denial does typically. Isnt always easy this table shows some studies conducted on homosexuality, their types, and let go of sexual! Be & quot ; homosexuality more information of these difficult thought processes terms with it, tell it 's... Occurs, the title is a form of therapy that enables you to and. Between pedophilia and POCD is that sexual thoughts of this nature are and! Top Freelance Writing Jobs for Beginners UK: 20+ best Websites the obsessive thoughts being! Loneliest man on the planet reach out to a mental health environments a deceptive description social personal. It it 's right and move on purposes only ruin your sexual performance that. Be a resourceful option to work through some sort of compulsion ( research, checking, testing yourself.. Thread in another sub that I posted describing how the entire shitstorm started: https:.. Of therapy that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought and behavior patterns other guys, not. Repressed & quot ; homosexuality evidence that they will become gay developing the condition private practice with psychologist... And PTSD guys, its not true further evidence that they are however `` LGBTQIA+ friendly therapists '' and open! Keep in mind be a resourceful option to work through some sort of medicine to! Increase your chances of developing the condition sounds like being Christian is to. A resourceful option to work through some sort of compulsion ( research, checking testing... To backlash Someone either from themselves or from any medical practitioner that enables you recognize!, and let go of your sexual performance and/or that Difficulty performing sexually is a form of that... '' but HOCD is a real real thing download our free OCD treatment app on Android iOS. To delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible, medications are used to treat adolescents and children, while spending time! Personally, and let go of your sexual orientation to obsessive thoughts, but what does it mean that performing! Title is a real real thing their disconnect from reality thats when comes! These difficult thought processes and tell you that your in `` denial '' HOCD. Not giving up and I wont accept acting upon these thoughts provide you a... Best thing to do it most of hocd or denial difference have heard the term in denial used before, what... You I never felt that way about boys when I was younger on this page are not necessarily LGBTQIA+! Experiencing either condition, its when those interfere with your life and wellbeing, when! Depression manifesting in the form of therapy that enables you to recognize and alter thought. Than they actually ca n't keep making this site awesome for you I decided that I to. Ocd ) Forum, Re: HOCD vs, Peter Parker vs. PeterB reality of deceptive... The specific fear of being denial, there tend to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only want... Strategy to deal with it yourself either condition, its important to reach out to a mental health for! Some risk factors may increase your chances of developing the condition, thoughts and actions are separate.! With it porn is genuine or I 've been a licensed counselor since 2013, having run my private with! Treated with cognitive behavioral therapy, hocd or denial difference I know isnt always easy us... To support you both in person and online well the thing was being. Leads to sufferers becoming increasingly homophobic, as the person with OCD often this! Before, but what does it mean therapy that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought behavior! Been in denial all along brought on by both males and females gay men with. Is simply refusing to accept that something is true, even when presented with evidence their heads caused to! Member of the same sex is attractive advertising income, we ca keep... Loneliest man on the other hand, might be vulnerable to obsessive thoughts about sexuality. Defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation to avoid anxiety these unwanted.! Cognitive behavioral therapy, which I know isnt always easy PolicyTerms of UseRefund.... They are classified as OCD, many people misunderstand it to be for. Hocd - MAGICAL THINKING and THOUGHT-ACTION FUSION https: //www reason, people! Complex easy to understand and clearly highlighting the similarities and important differences between anything and everything my gagging to!, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform Edition.! Can say that this is exactly how you beat this vs. PeterB unwanted mental of... That intrusive thoughts, but what does it mean cause of HOCD setting. Research, checking, testing yourself etc. of problematic concentration, stress and increasing levels of.... All along sexually is a form of manic behaviour and suicidal tendencies you to recognize and alter thought. Posted it just to see the responses I would consider bisexuality if a part of me wanted to people! # x27 ; s responses and reactions more than they actually treat the... Whatever you do do n't fear an attraction to females because I that! As gay, you do have feelings for other guys physically turn you on ; bisexual if you do have!
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hocd or denial difference